Thankful Thursday: Blessed.

Having somewhere to go is

Home.

Having someone to love is

Famliy.

Having both is a

blessing.

-unknown

Work-To-Do-Wednesday: Being There.

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It has been awhile since I have been in the blogosphere. I must admit that sometimes it bothers me that I don’t have the time (or energy) to post everyday. I want to be a dedicated blogger, but I also want to and must do many other things. I have a duty and obligation to many things so I must prioritize which leaves blogging near the bottom of my list. Should this bother me? Probably not, but it does. Perhaps that makes me an overachiever or simply unrealistic, but in this fast-paced technological world we live in I see others do it and am often guilty of mentally beating myself because I do not. I feel like a failure, even though I know in reality, nothing could be further from the truth.

I organize and try to make the most of each hour for the purpose of staying “caught up.” As moms and wives, we feel that multitasking is just part of our life. We cook supper, while running the washer and dryer, thinking of what needs to be prepared for the next day, all while keeping an eye on our children who are usually under our feet. Don’t misunderstand, caring for our homes and loved ones is truly a blessing, but it is one we must keep balanced. Will we have to multitask often? Definitely, it is simply a part of motherhood but we must recognize when our full attention is required. In this day of social media, we constantly compare ourselves to our friends who post pictures of their child’s perfect birthday party, play date with friends or meal times and feel that we have fallen incredibly short because we barely got the highchair cleaned up today, much less the entire house and instead of a homemade meal, we stick a Stouffer’s entrée in the oven or maybe just a frozen pizza. So in an effort to “keep up with the Jones’s,” we sacrifice giving our undivided attention and usually still end up feeling like a failure at all we attempt. We beat ourselves up because we are not supermom (& wife), forgetting that no one expects us to be her in the first place.

So I was having these thoughts the other day when I heard much needed advice. The advice was simply, be there. It doesn’t matter what you’re doing. If you’re at work, be there. If you’re playing catch with your child, be there. If you’re having a meal with your spouse, be there. Close your laptop and get down in the floor and spend some time playing with your children. Put your book away and spend time asking your husband about his day. Lay your cell phone down, that notification wasn’t that important. Will you have less time to spend with your hobbies by adopting the “Be there” approach? Possibly, but I guarantee years from now, you won’t be looking back on your life regretting that you didn’t post on your blog each day. Your blog will be there when your husband is gone and your children are grown. Keep that in your mind and be there.

Tough Truth Tuesday: Define "Having it All"

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        If you have been watching the news or morning talk shows in the last few days you have probably heard about the controversial advice given by Sheryl Sandberg, COO of Facebook in her book, Lean In. Let me state here that I have not read the book; my knowledge of its contents comes from those who have. What I do know about this book is that is the discussion it has sparked. Sandberg is using this book to encourage women to assert themselves in the workplace to level the playing field with men. Sandberg is of the opinion that men rule the workplace as well as the world.

Whether Sandberg’s are true or not, since the release of this book, I have heard the topic of women’s equality with men revisited. I have heard career women state that women can have it all; they no longer need to choose between a job and family. I may be very unpopular for my next statement, but I disagree. I don’t think women can have both. Now before you jump all over me for not defending my sex, hear me out. In most cases starting a family and pursing a career demand much of your attention and require you to begin either at a fairly young age. You may argue with me here and say that you know of plenty of women who do both and encourage you to do the same. I hope you will keep in mind that most of the women encouraging you to pursue your career and further your dreams of a family make more money than you and I combined, therefore are able to hire all sorts of help to run their homes, allowing them to focus on their careers. Forgive me for stating the obvious here, but do you really have it all if someone else is raising your children? There are many women who must work, and there are some who work at times that still allow them to care for their families and I am not referring to these women. I refer to those who pursue careers at the cost of their family.

            This writer is of the opinion that one of the main reasons our country has seen such decline over the past few years is because women no longer have a desire to be in the home. Our culture pushes the idea that being a housewife is not a true profession. Society wants us as women to believe that the only way we can be equal to men is by proving ourselves in the workplace. This is so far from the truth. Men and women are not in a competition. Men and women complement each other. As much as many women want to believe otherwise, we simply are not equal to men in the workplace, just as men are not equal to women in areas of housekeeping and mothering. Both sexes excel in different areas, which is precisely  the way God designed it.

            The Bible teaches that a woman’s place is in the home. Titus 2:2-5 states:

“That the aged men be sober, grave, temperate, sound in faith, in charity, in patience. The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.”

           

            The majority of ladies do not realize what a blessing it is to assume the role of homemaker. This is so sad to me because I know many wonderful ladies who would love to take on that role, while so many others squander it away. Keeping a home is not a walk in the park. Many people believe as Ricky did when he said to Lucy…”Anyone can lie around the house all day.” Proverbs 31:10-31 provides a job description for the position of keeper at home and proves that it is a full time job that is to be taken very seriously. There is a great deal of truth to the statement, “The hand that rocks the cradle is the hand that rules the world.”

Being a homemaker is one of the greatest blessings God has given women. Is it as glamorous as being the COO of Facebook? Not quite. Your days are filled with spit up instead of coffee breaks, dirty diapers and potty training instead of board meetings, soccer practice instead of dinner dates with potential clients, and bedtime stories instead of email correspondence. You will not get a raise because of your exemplary work. You will not get an award for being employee of the month. Despite the benefits that come with a postiion admired by the world, following the steps of the virtuous woman is far more rewarding in the end. While I do not agree with the religious views of Gordon B. Hinckley, he made a statement we should all take to heart:

“Women who make a house a home make a far greater contribution to society than those who command large armies or stand at the head of impressive corporations.”

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So you decide, who really has it all?

Motivational Monday: What I Could Do

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If I wanted to, I could help make my home congregation the most wide-awake and working congregation in all the world.

If I wanted to, I could visit members who are sick or homebound and find other ways of helping them.

If I wanted to, I could attend Bible classes regularly and encourage others to do the same.

If I wanted to, I could show more devotion in worship and receive much more good from the service myself.

If I wanted to, I could tell others about Christ and His church and lead them to Him.

Of course, this all depends on what I want to do. I have the ability.

I could be an honored servant of the King of Kings…

if I really wanted to.